The end of Ditzy Mummy

Hey there, its been a while as I've been far too hectic. I had my brothers' wedding at which I gave a reading - well the wrong reading. I got my Song of Solomon passages wrong, so after forgetting my reading and then having to get up at a lectern the rector had put out another Song of Solomon passage that I had originally said I would do. I went with the reading I had been practising. Anyway it was a fantastic wedding, lots of friendly people (who could have been artifically stimulated to be friendly if you get my drift!). 

I've also realised that after being incredibly broke that I need to get some freelance work (diversity / human rights training or consultancy if anyone is interested) and I don't have enough time. So something has to give and as I don't get many comments / feedback on this blog I've decided my blog has to go. It seems that to make a blog really successful I need to put time and effort in. For the time being its the end of Diary of Ditzy Mummy but to end with another ditzy moment, I recently bought an iPod off ebay (I poured lemon juice on hubbie's which is the 3rd one I've lost or broken). The iPod had been working but when I was walking whilst using it this weekend it kept going on pause, and I couldn't get it to stop. I contacted the seller to point out it now wasn't working and he got annoyed as he said it was working when he sold it to me 3 weeks ago. Hubbie then pointed out that the headphones it had come with had a pause button on it. Oh s**t not again, I need a brain transplant.  

Silent Sunday

Triathlon

On bank holiday Monday I completed a sprint triathlon which was 426 metres swim in an open air pool (heated) followed by a 21K cycle and then a 5K run. I had to be there at 6am and at 5.30am I was having a massive panic as my bike had a puncture so I had to borrow hubbie’s much larger bicycle. I’m not bad at swimming so I was starting at no.166 out of about 400 people but I also knew that I’d knocked about a minute off my time. Off I started, 15 seconds between each competitor but after about half a length I’d caught up with the guy in front, we’d been told that if we wanted to overtake to touch the foot of the person in front, but he was doing this weird kick (come on how hard is kicking with straight legs??) so I couldn’t catch his foot. Eventually one of the officials asked him to let me overtake him. Then onto the cycling, I wasn’t used to the gears so the chain came off as soon as I set off – ah big panic as I don’t know about bike stuff so had to ask a marshal on the course. I’m also not that fast at cycling and only had a mountain bike with everyone else having road bikes. Apparently these bikes are a lot faster, not sure how but I’ll use that as an excuse for being so slow. Lots of people overtook me but I quite enjoyed the cycling. Next was the running, as I have a  dodgy knee I did some running training but I couldn’t do long distances. I struggled but what was so lovely about this triathlon was that all the marshals looked up your race number and called out encouragement using your name. Very uplifting when you’re panting like a dog! I managed to complete the race in 1 hr 44 mins which I thought was good until I looked up my placing later that evening and I was in the bottom 50 (out of 400) which is disappointing.


I also felt terrible afterwards like I had a really bad hangover, very sick which was due to dehydration I didn’t drink enough water or fluids during the race and still felt dodgy the next day. But now planning my training for the next one, I’ve caught the triathlon bug.

Muddling up my words

With a dose of ditziness and tiredness I often get words muddled. Here's some recent crackers:

• Calling the kindle I'd bought my mum for her birthday a kimble (I think that's a better name!)
• Referring to hovercraft parenting - instead of helicopter parenting
• Yesterday I tried to describe a small bag I need for my bicycle to the man in the v.professional bicycle shop. He had to ask many questions just to get the right type of bag, must of thought I was a little mad.  

I think son 2 has inherited this characteristic (maybe its not down to sleep deprivation and too many balls to juggle) as he often gets his words muddled. Today he wanted to be caper-sized in the swimming pool rather than capsized. Poor child, his older brother often takes the p**s. What words do you get mixed up?

New nursery

Back to work yesterday after a week off with the kids. I had to 'settle' son 3 at his new nursery over the week which was strange and as with the other 2 boys felt slightly wrong leaving him. The staff must have thought I was the stupidest mummy as I didn't leave enough nappies etc, right clothes etc. Its just getting back in the habit of being organised, I've been so used to having a nanny who was often left with no food, not enough clean nappies (I use re-usable nappies), moody kids etc that I am not used to being super organised. Help, how do I become super mum?? On another note, my 2 older boys are driving me mad, one is moody and naughty (he kicked one of his shoes off into a lake at Chiswick House my friend nearly split herself in half on a fence rescuing it) and the other is going through the biggest growth spurt with huge amounts of growth hormones making him have toddler tantrums (he's nearly 7!). I also realised I'm not cured of my ditiziness, my friend in Singapore who recently had her 3 child got sent a lovely card from me without anything written inside. Well I'm sure the mystery kept her guessing for days.   

Silent Sunday

Soft Play Centres

With the summer holidays still looming ahead I took the boys to a different soft playcentre that I got a deal through Groupon for a chain called Gamboda and they have one in Chelsea. Let me give you some history on my relationship with soft play centres: I'm not keen, its like an ex-boyfriend you forget the bad bits; think its not too bad; serves a purpose; but then you meet up and hate them. We have 2 soft playcentres that are nearish to us. The first one is dirty, expensive and the staff deserve a slap around the face with a wet fish (I have complained about a incident where they charged for son 3 when he was 6 months old, I got a voucher but couldn't bear to go back). The second is not so bad, its in North London and it has off peak prices which are useful for son 2 and son 1 to take but weirdly there are a lot of over-protective parents so there are more adults than children in the play structure (is that what's its called?) than children with their arms stretched out ready to catch their little darlings if they fall. Also, why are they so expensive in London I went to visit my lovely friend in Norfolk and it was only £2.95 rather than £9.75 - why the difference? So, yesterday off we went to Chelsea Harbour and spent 5 minutes getting in as we had to register and take photos of everyone (including me) which was very 'big brother'. Inside it was clean, still desperately noisy but that's inevitable in the school holidays (but one women I think a nanny had managed to fall asleep). They also had bumper cars and a great bit for under 2s which son 3 loved but after a few hours and a few tantrums later from each child, sometimes at the same time I decided to leave. Son 3 really didn't want to go and had big struggle putting his shoes on so I was quite flustered. But I couldn't get out, I had to give them our registration card to log us out and I couldn't find it. I actually said to the assistant "I just want to get out, let me out of here, why do I need a card to get out of here, let me out". That reaction made me realise I don't like soft play centres, today we're going to a nice quiet playground.

Cycling

You may have noticed that there's not been many posts lately is because I've been busy training for a sprinte triathalon ( a mini triathalon). This has involved cycling a lot on the mean streets of London. This has been an eye-opener, I always thought it was cars that were the danger but its actually other cyclists. They are so competitive...Everyone overtakes me and I'm sure I'm not that slow, but it seems that cycling to work I'm actually in a pretend competition. I started blaming my bike, maybe if I get a road bike that might help as I have a mountain bike (when I'm going near a mountain I don't know) but apparently I'm just slow. Last week I cycled all the way to work through the beautiful parks of London but I got lost trying to get to St James's Park. In particular on the way back, I really got lost and wondered why through Piccadilly there were no other cyclists. Because they all know how to cycle back through parks! Whoops. I also found the cycle home exhausting, I nearly caught hold of a passing car to get a ride home. So I will keep you posted on how I do in 2 weeks in the sprinte triathalon (my goal is to finish).  

The Gallery - Water

As part of The Gallery  here is my photo to represent Water. This was taken recently on our holiday to Greece and this photo reminds me of how my boys enjoyed jumping, splashing, laughing, and diving in the swimming pool. This is son 2 who has always been a water baby, he loves swimming under the water (not so good on the top even after tons of lessons).  I love how the water distorts the image and makes him look slightly like a ghost.  Go to the Gallery and check out all the other entries...

The Riots

This post may not be the most ‘ up beat’ post I have written but I’m angry at what is happening across England with the rioting that has spread. I live Ealing which is one of the areas that had a bunch of ignorant kids burning cars and looting shops under the guise of ‘rioting’ for a protest. Our house is about half a mile from Ealing Broadway and I know some of the shop owners whose shops were looted. I can’t believe that the Police couldn’t contain these kids from wrecking the centre of Ealing, normally on a Friday night there are lots of Police around. Last week I had to stop 2 kids from stealing bikes from outside the main shopping area (I’ve had my type stolen from my bike in the same spot). I’m not surprised that it happened as I do believe that some people do not have the social morals to understand that destroying people’s livelihoods and homes is wrong and cruel. There’s been many questions asked about motives and Hello its Gemma had an interesting post. I believe that’s its not a broken society but a tiny minority who are greedy and don’t want to work to buy the goods that they could loot instead. I can say this as I used to work with long term unemployed for many years running projects to help them get back into work. There were a few (and most long term unemployed do want to work but are caught in the benefits trap) that fundamentally didn’t want to work unless they were paid extremely well. I do believe the Metropolitan Police could have planned Monday night better. I work near Scotland Yard so I frequently see the Riot Police around when they're preparing for protects etc so I want surprised they couldn't get them to Ealing and other parts of London quicker. They'd had riots on Saturday night in Tottenham and then when it spread on Sunday night, so they could have planned better for Monday night.  On a ligher note, my mum who was worried about me on the mean streets on London told me to get a baseball bat to protect myself. Ok, Mum don't think it will fit into my bag and the kids would want to play with it.

My six year old's girlfriend

It's official son 1 has a girlfriend, he had playdate with her on Friday. It all started a few weeks before the end of term, I was sorting out his school book bag and saw a lovely picture which I was just about to put it on the fridge when he told me it was from Rachel at school. I turned it over and it was a love letter (ah so sweet). She's a lovely little blonde thing whose not one of the popular girls in his year so I thought I would boost her future self-esteem as I'm not boosting but my son is gorgeous! That night, we had a chat about Rachel and I suggested that he asked her to be his girlfriend. He thought this was a good idea but then I asked what he was going to do about the 'girl next door' who has always been his 'girlfriend'. He then pondered this in that way that boys / men do. The next evening I asked if he'd spoken to Rachel, he said yes and that she had responded with the message that she knew he would eventually be his girlfriend. I like her confidence, maybe she didn't need my help with her self-esteem. Her mum then organised a playdate for them, don't worry its all v.innocence. Do you think he'll appreciate my suggestions for girlfriends when he's older???

The Gallery: Birth

I could go on about the birth of my 3 sons for the Gallery. Instead I'll focus on the 'vain' part of birth for me, that is the first photo of me with my newborn, spanking brand new baby! With son 1, I looked probably the worse I've ever looked - I look like I'd been on a bender for 4 days with no sleep. Minus the alcohol, that's how it felt - induced Monday night, then Tuesday, then Wednesday, then Thursday, finally born early Friday morning by emergency caesaran with massive blood loss. My mum took this photo and then proceeded to show it ever person she came into contact with for about a year, including an ex-boyfriend. Great!

Son 1

Son 2

After son 1, I was not going to make the same mistake. As I had an elective caesaran I made sure I'd done my hair and make-up that morning, the drugs also seemed to make me glow (literally) so this is my favourite photo of my birth. I didn't look this great 24 hours later though, after son 2 would not sleep at night (went on for a month).

Son 3

With son 3, it was nearly 2 years ago and I felt like this 3rd pregnancy had aged me a lot. I was very chilled out with my natural caesaran (another post to explain this) after the birth but I did look on the large size so not too pleased with this photo. You might also notice relief as my elective caesaran was delayed by a day due to other emergency caesarans (one was my sister-in-laws best friend who nearly died so put it all into perspective). At the time I was really upset and very anxious as I'd had the date booked for 10 weeks but after hubbie fainted in the operating theatre the hysterical laughing had relaxed me a lot. So how was your birth photo? 

Camp Bestival

 We have just returned from Camp Bestival where we had a marvellous time. Early in the year hubbie and I were discussing (as we do every year but never sort it out) that it would be great if we could go to a music festival preferably without the kids. We were looking at the Giles Peterson Worldwide Festival on a beach in the South of France (I know it looked amazing). After I got very excited especially as it was so cheap I then couldn’t find flights that would fit in with our childcare. I then looked up Camp Bestival which looked good as it was family friendly so wouldn’t be full of drunk 19 year olds (just middle aged drunk parents). Got our 4 man tent sorted, dropped off kids for a split weekend with grandparents and drove down to Dorset on Friday morning. When we turned up, we walked around all the fields trying to find a small patch of grass to pitch our tent, we started noticing that everyone had children with them, we were a minority being without our kids. After walking around the festival we figured out why, basically the whole festival is designed for families with 2 areas just for children (arts / crafts, circus skills, dressing up, discos and the list goes on). We had 2 options, get annoyed with ourselves for leaving the kids behind or embrace the freedom. Guess which option we took, so we sat in the fields (sometimes danced) and drank red wine / cider / cocktails and we ate loads of different exotic food. The only issue was that as I'm slightly ditzy (wow really I hear you say!) so acres and acres of tents I could never find ours fortunately I didn't try and get into some strangers tent. My highlights were: 

Blondie

• Labyrinth – Getting down with the teenagers by jumping up and down to this talented singer who was brilliant.
• Blondie – Debbie Harry although was a bit un-energetic at first (I think she’s 62) got rocking and I loved hearing all their old songs with lots of thirty something parents rocking along and was a really great atmosphere.
• Newton Faulkner – This dreadlocked white guy could really get the crowd going, he did a couple of covers including teardrop by Massive Attack and was so amazing on the guitar.
• Ed Sheeran – He’s only 18 but has bundles of confidence. For his late afternoon performance the big top was packed out and the surrounding field, very popular performer and he was great as well. Really talented singer / songwriter and all the 15 year old girls loved him, there must be something about him that gets the young girls going. See his cool new video that is using sign language for the lyrics http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXvzzTICvJs&feature=relmfu

I would really recommend Camp Bestival, it was really well organised and a lot of thought had gone into the line-up and the timings to cater for the audience. I loved it but next year we are taking the kids.

Mix up

I am fortunate that my mum and mother-in-law look after my boys alternate wednesdays so I can save some money on childcare. They have been doing this since son 1 was a baby which has been a life-saver. As they've taken over from me whose turn it is organising  to cater for their numerous holidays I sometimes get confused whose turn it is but normally figure it out. Apart from yesterday, I was frantically tidying up and cleaning the kitchen as I thought it was my mother-in-law turn and telling the kids that "granny was coming" (which means they get bought some plastic tat or magazines from the corner shop). Imagine my surprise when I called out that granny was here but it was actually nanny. My poor mum got greeted with me saying "oh its you, I wouldn't have bothered cleaning up" and son 1 wailing that he wanted granny instead. I'd forgotten that granny was on holiday for a week. I'm sure more mistakes kids left will happen over the summer holidays as I have eclectic arrangements for childcare with 2 sons here / there / everywhere, whilst the baby is somewhere else, left at friends, with Dad, with grandparents, at playschemes, nurseries etc - Phew!!!

Flashback Friday - Look at that hair

As part of Flashback Friday, I thought I would get involved. This is a photo of me just before I left school (I'm on the left) with the crazy hair. What were we thinking in the 80s? I used to backcomb by fringe and flick my hair back with loads of hairspray. The denium jacket I loved and on the back I sewed in some paisley fabric - nice.

Now head over to Cafebebe and check out the other entries for flackback Friday.

Creativity

Son 2's way of helping birds

Son 2 who is 4 and half years old always keeps me on my toes with his amazing imagination and sometimes eccentricity (can be a child be eccentric?). His latest invention was when he had been thinking about why the birds had not used his bird box he'd painted at christmas and left in the garden. He informed me that the birds needed a platform to get into the bird box, and so he wanted to stick the badmington racket to the bird box so they could land on it and get in.. I'm quite used to his strange demands so I get black tape and stuck the racket to the bird box. He'd also decided that as he'd found a drawing pin and decided it was imperative that he stuck his drawing to a tree outside our house. Son 1 obviously got jealous and when I came home from work he'd also drawn a picture and also stuck it onto the next tree. I wonder if people walking along the street think the pictures are some sort of code for spies!! Son 1 also made me and hubbie laught last night as he's had sex education last term and decided to inform his brothers of the correct name for their willies. He's also referred to his tenticles which made me wonder what on earth he was talking about, it then clicked he was talking about his testicles. Ah the things kids say.

Did my mum really do that?

I went to my future sister-in-law’s hen do on Sunday which I had been stressing about all week. It was a 50s theme in homage to Becky and which I knew nothing about (apart from watching a few episodes of Mad Men). I spent most of my evenings watching ‘you tube’ clips on doing 50s hair styles (did you know you’re meant to curl hair around your fingers, pin with a clip and sleep on them to set the curls). On Sunday I set off with my 50s dress (new still with tags in as I was intending to take it back due to no funds in my bank account) and my attempt at 50s hair which was basically a frizzy mess. I was a little bit nervous as I hadn’t met any of Becky’s friends and imagined that as she’s a trendy hairdresser (Mayfair salon and very expensive) all her friends would be uber-cool and a decade younger than me. Then my mum mentioned she had been invited and would be coming along, which led to a conversation over what she should wear that would be 50s. I had to talk her out of wearing her ‘sun hat’ as that what she had interrupted as 50s style. Help!

So after a few hiccups with the boat at Camden Lock that had been hired for lunch and then cancelled we ended up at another bar that accommodated us. Fast forward a few hours later, lots of wine and shots (are shots appropriate in the afternoon was all I was thinking - I'm such a mum!!). All the girls were actually near my age with kids, all very chatty and loads of funny stories to tell about their lives. By this point I knew I was quite tipsy but had forgotten that my mum had also been drinking. When then progressed onto another part of the bar that had different themed rooms (well actually ex-stables). Then one we took over had a pole on a platform and all the girls had had a go pretending to pole dance. Now my mum is nearly 70, a bit Hyacinth Bucket and a dodgy hip so imagine my surprise when my mum climbed up onto this mini stage and did a bit of pole dancing. She then told one of the staff to ‘p**s off’ when he tried to remove all the cushions we were sitting on. I was shocked that she still had it in her!! 10 years ago I would be mortified with embarrassment but now I just found it funny.

Do girls rule the world?

Copyright Beyonce

As you may know I am a sort of feminist so I was interested to read a column in the Observer about Beyonce's new song "Run the World (Girls)". The only positive about not having a girl (3 boys instead) is that I don't have worry about the sexist opinions and the 'sexing' up of our young girls. I'd like to think I'm not a prude but if Beyonce is singing about girls ruling the world why does she have to do it, in her bra and knickers? I do worry about the future for girls, particularly as according to my beauty therapy friends most girls under 25 have no hair on their lady parts anymore (was going to put muff but I'm definately getting too old!). I question whether Beyonce is empowering women or setting standards and expectations that are unrealistic. If women are ruling the world are they doing it by being more creative and innovative than men or because they are wearing skimpy clothes. I thought the column was an interesting read as I just don't know the answers. I thought the slut walks were an interesting concept (I bet the policeman who started the walks with his slut comment doesn't) and I was intending to go on the London slut walk but as normal didn't get around to it. I try and do my bit by educating my boys that girls are equal see my feminist post.

On my ditzy side, for a long time I thought Beyonce's hair was real as she advertising hair products for European hair, my knowledge on weaves has been enlightening (thanks Melissa).  

The challenge of childcare

Our nanny has quit which was not a surprise as she'd told me she was looking for other work that would fit in with us. So it was when rather than if. She’s been working for us for 3 years now with about a 9 month break when I was on maternity leave (her decision not mine) and the two older boys are really fond of her so its going to be upsetting. I'm now in the process of sorting out our complicated childcare arrangements as son 2 is starting school in September. Prior to our nanny son 1 and son 2 were at a private day nursery for about 3.5 years and I had son 1 booked in when I was only 4 months into my pregnancy (wow, how organised did I used to be).



Although we live in nappy valley, there is a lack of decent nurseries near the tube station. After ringing around, there were 3 nurseries that have spaces for son 3 whose turning two at the end of September. The first nursery we visited was recommended by next door neighbour and I got a good vibe on the telephone from them. However, my first impressions were lukewarm. All the children were playing outside and there seemed tons of them. I know you shouldn’t look at the buildings but it was grey and drab on the outside. But inside it was welcoming, all seemed fine but as son 3 was crying (he’s very astute so had guessed it was a place he would be left by me) but I forgot to ask the questions I needed. At this point, I liked this nursery and thought this was the one as the staff seemed caring, lots of toys and space and kids looked happy. The second nursery was disappointing to say the least, small rooms with staff who were not playing with the children and didn’t seem bothered with them. None of the staff engaged with son 3 (or indeed son 2 who was there as well) which was a bad sign. At one point, a child was crying and instead of finding out why, I heard a staff member just tell them to be quiet. When I got the fees list this explained the quality, it was dirt cheap (you pay for what you get). Also I would have to pay £30 to be put on a waiting list – why would I pay money for you not to guarantee a place??? Also, their policy was that all parents had to be there at the latest 5.55pm and off the premises by 6pm, but their opening hours are 8am until 6pm so my thinking was if I’m paying for that precious 5 mins to run back from the tube station then I should get it.


The third nursery we visited I had all 3 boys with me, I couldn’t find it and was about to give up so was late and flustered. But it was a nursery in a house which was like the tardis (it was massive out the back) it was recommended by a women at work whose daughter goes there and she’s the same age as son 3. When the owner came to show us around, I picked up son 3 and misjudged the space behind me and bumped his head on the wall – whoops (the owner probably wondered why I had 3 children when I couldn't cope with one toddler)! I got a good vibe just my sitting in the reception bit, lots of info on the employee of the month, the policies, detail on how long the staff had worked there and been working in childcare. Very organised and professional and with lots of space. The difference between this visit which lasted 45 mins compared to the 10 mins at the other two was amazing. I was told all about their food, playtimes, arts and crafts etc. Systems such as allocating a key worker when the child had bonded with a worker impressed me, as normally they are allocated a key worker straight away and this way seemed more logical. I was also introduced to all the staff by name, the staff and children seemed happy and there was a calm atmosphere. Having such a long visit allowed me to get a better feel for the nursery. I quickly changed my mind even if the fees were higher than the other 2 (not substantially). I liked that when son 3 wandered off to play in their playground, a member of staff returned him back to me.


My tips for looking at nurseries: (1) go with your gut instinct, does it feel right (2) Did the staff interact with your child, are they playing with the children or standing around chatting? (3) What did the rooms feels like, was there enough space, variety of toys, schedule of activities – this could be indoors or outdoors space (4) are they flexible or was the nursery setting out their own rules before what would fit your needs (5) What’s their turnover of staff, ask how long their staff have been working at their nursery. Now I just have to find a childminder and cover the long summer holidays.


Hope that helps, will keep you updated whether son 3’s new nursery works out and if my top tips works. Any other tips for looking for a nursery?

Silent Sunday

I know this should be a photo with no words - but this inflatable dinosaur made hubbie jump when he came home to an empty house and thought it was a dog or a fox.

Plane story

As promised a few ditzy stories from the journey to our holiday. Its now nearly 2 weeks since we’ve returned but had a v.hectic time as our nanny has finally quit (see previous post) so I’ve been manically arranging childcare for over the summer holidays and a new nursery for son 3, I will tell you some of the nursery visit stories soon which might help if you’re looking at childcare .



So, back to the holiday. As we’re boarding the plane (early morning flight etc) son 2 asks “what are the big round things at the end of the aeroplane’s wings”. Now I’m not the least bit interested in how things work, I don’t care as long as washing machines, cars, boilers etc work. Many times when mechanics have been explaining about why my car doesn’t work my eyes just glaze over and I start thinking about how I need to paint my toe nails or hurry up one of the kids is trying to climb under / into / over a car in the garage. Back to story, so I told son 2 that I didn’t know what they were, he asks “are they the engines” at which point I’m tired and respond that I always thought the engine were underneath the plane. Hubbie is listening to all of this and after trying to disassociate himself from me, he then can't help but pipe up that he can’t believe that I didn’t know that the big round things are the engines and how could I not know how the plane flies. Why should I, I’m not scared of flying (I now love it without kids as I can get to watch films) so its a waste of time me knowing how the plane works. This time my ditiziness was more embarrassing for hubbie than me.

Another photo of our hols!

I’ve also had people asking where we went, so I say Sivota on mainland Greece, yes but where on the mainland they ask. I’ve had to admit, I had no idea as we got on a plane and then a coach to be taken to the resort. We were told that the nearest island we could see Corfu on the right and Paxos on the left but do we really need to know where in Greece we went? (Hubbie doesn’t know either).

Any tips please on getting my followers showing again on blogger, they’ve disappeared!

Silent Sunday

Gorgeous Greece

You may have noticed that I've been a bit quiet recently as I have been on holiday. We took the 3 boys to gorgeous Greece with the fantastic holiday company  Neilson. We had such an amazing holiday I really didn't want to come home. As normal we were completely unorganised, not with the kids stuff but with our own stuff. I hadn't really realised that Neilsons provided loads of free sports (windsurfing, tennis, sailing, fitness classes, bike rides etc) so I hadn't packed much sporty clothes and left my jogging trousers by accident. So I had to wear same smelly t-shirts to do sports in. Hubbie and I did the tennis course (him the intermediate and me the beginner). It was an hour a day in the blazing heat but the coaches were brilliant and fairly amusing, even if my tennis was complete rubbish (hubbie was runner-up in both singles and doubles - flash git). One of the tennis coach who was young but v.confident and I happened to mention to hubbie that he was the type of bloke I would have gone for before meeting hubbie. I so wish I hadn't said that as the mickey taking didn't stop. Then after about 4 days I saw him without his sunglasses and he looked he didn't look as hot as I thought (beady eyes!). Then to my horror, I found out he was only 19 and realised that I'd been lusting a boy that could be my son. I'm such an old leech!!

We also met some lovely friendly people, really normal and nice from variety of backgrounds, ages and different parts of the UK, all interested in doing sports. I've never had such an active holiday, I went for a 7k jog at 8am, a 27k bike ride, and played lots of bad tennis. Felt v.virtuous but still managed to put on 3lbs as lots of lovely food as well. Kids loved it, son 1 learnt how to dive and they all loved the kids club (was on all day but only had them in the morning) and son 1 and son 2 were lucky boys as hubbie sorted out tennis lessons for them as well. At their age, it was a holiday on a long boat along the Thames (I hated the life jackets my safety conscious Dad made us wear). I have lots more ditzy stories to tell about the holiday so look out for more posts.  

Getting confused

Yesterday, we went to our lovely friends (we'll call them Jane and Tom) for a BBQ. When we arrived with the 3 boys we were introduced to Jane's parents, her brother, his girlfriend and her nephew, a small blond toddler. I was sort of listening to the introductions but at the same time racing after the boys trying to get suncream on and stop them ruining their beautiful house. Jane's parents were telling me how they had looked after their grandson that morning and so I assumed that the toddler belonged to Jane's brother and his girlfriend. So later on I'm making small talk with the girlfriend and saying how she must have enjoyed her lie-in that morning and what did they do with their morning off. Strange looks from her for a good 5 minutes and then I realised that the toddler wasn't hers, he was being looked after by the grandparents as Jane's other sister and husband were at a wedding (I do vaguely remember someone telling me that). How ditzy and dozy. Felt a bit better when our other friend at the BBQ made the same mistake but he was a bit more direct in his questioning of the girlfriend so he didn't have a 5 minute 'weird' conversation. Lesson to myself, I must listen when people are being introduced to me.  

Being a working mum

Wow - what a working mother!

I have been having a few issues at work with workload and trying to fit everything into 3 days (I'm often doing work in evenings etc). I work set days due to childcare arrangements of nanny and grandparents. I have to sometimes go to meetings / deliver training etc on my non-working days and I have to arrange additional childcare. When I ask my boss if I can get paid to work an extra day he always remarks that the budget can't afford it (NHS Trust) and can't I just  swap my days around. I have explained about my childcare and that my nanny has other jobs on my non-working days but the message is not going in.

I'm sure I've explained my childcare arrangements but he doesn't seem to understand. I need to sometimes catch up with work and I believe its fair that I get paid to cover these extra days. Am I being a whinning working mummy? Or should I put up and shut up???

How do I explain in simple terms how childcare works?? Do I have to spell out, if you want me to work I have to pay someone?  Any tips or suggestions most welcome.  

Inquisitive children

Our adorable 4 year old who is named son 2 is always inquisitive and doesn't believe that anything will hurt him. If you say, careful you'll fall off that climbing frame he'll have to try it our for himself. Last night, he started playing with my perfume that I'd stupidly left on the side. I told him not to spray it as it would sting his cut arm (from another incident that day), as I go to the run the bath for bedtime I hear the loudest scream. He'd sprayed the perfume right in his eye, and stayed screaming for a good 10 minutes. After he'd calmed down he asked me to hide the perfume from him so he didn't hurt himself again. Maybe he's learnt a lesson, or everytime he smells Chanel Adore in his life it will bring back the memory of stinging eyes.

Son 1 is in Year 1 and we've had the letter reporting they will have sex and relationship education. Seems a bit young but hey, apparently he said they'll be talking about 'feelings', a bit fluffy for me but its a start. The only problem is that I've explained about the birds and the bees in another way, see previous post "Oh the lies I tell" and it will be embarrassed if he explains this to his teacher.  

My weekend round up

I had an interesting weekend with lots of different experiences. On saturday night my friend came to visit from Brighton so I took her to down to the river for a few drinks as the weather was gorgeous. We watched the sunset over Richmond Bridge and I realised I'm getting middle-aged as I was so fascinated by the ducks landing on the water plus as it was heaving in the pubs, we kept walking out of them all as we'd decided at our age we don't queue at bars!! But, the big shock of the night was getting the bus home about 10.30pm and some youngish blokes started a fight on the bus. The poor bus driver was calling the police but they didn't arrive until my friend called 999. I think I must be immune to violence in London as it only started scarring me when the guy who had stood up to these 3 abusive blokes was getting a good kicking. I was surprised at how many people did intervene and try to stop the fight, they probably had their 'beer armour' on! I was annoyed that this happened on Richmond High Street outside the train station and the police were so slow to arrive.

A massive contrast to a family visit to a Treacle Fair near Reading, as my brother has decided to become a morris dancer not the bells and hankies one but the ones who have sticks. I know - I don't get it either but apparently joined as it involved beer! The kids loved it and got to sit in a police car, fire engine and royal air force vehicle. The morris dancing was unusual and there's definately a type that joins. See their you tube clip

The mice have moved in

Our next door neighbour has had mice on and off for a while but the mice have decided to get a take a bit more of a risk and travel further afield into our house. We've heard scratching under the floorboards a while ago but hubbie saw a little mouse scruying across our floor a few weeks ago. Off I got to the mouse catching shop and I had a lengthy discussion withe the assistant about humane and more drastic measures to get rid of the mice. I decided I didn't want to catch the mice and let them free to run wild in a field as a) we're not near any fields and b) they're trespassing in our house so they need to face the consequences and let all their friends know our house is out of bounds. So I went for the "not very nice" option. After cleaning under all nooks and crannies and banning the children from eating any food whilst wandering around we put down mouse traps under the kitchen cupboards. I did think they'd packed up and gone on holiday (see Ancedotes of a Manic Mum) as now all our food is in a million containers. But a few nights ago came down the kitchen to be greeted by a grey mouse having a party. My scream actually made it jump in the air, we then found a dead mouse under the kitchen cupboards. Hence a long discussion with hubbie about whether the dead mouse was the same mouse I'd seen 5 minutes before as it was so scared that it had run into the mouse trap by accident. Hubbie was sure that it had been there a while but would not conduct a post-mortem. The next morning the boys wanted to see the dead mouse, so I tried to pick up the corpse but its little beady eyes were looking at me so had to get hubbie to show them. Son 2 then wanted to play with it, ah gross!! Hopefully they've gone but will keep you all posted.   

Stuck in the mud

I have signed up for a sprint triathlon which involves training 5 times a week and I'm finding a bit of a struggle fitting in. Last Sunday early in the morning I went out for a long session on my bike along the Thames. So off I set from Kew Bridge and was doing ok managing to cycle along the narrow path so I could get a lovely view of the Thames (I'm such a middle aged mum!). This was perfect until I got to a section near a bridge where I couldn't see how I could continue on a path, so I decided to go under the bridge (Barnes) as the tide was out. I sensibly asked the rowers who were launching (not sure if that's the right word) their boats if I could get back onto a path if I went under the bridge, to which they replied yes. Off I set pushing my bike, then the mud started getting thicker and thicker. I was struggling to push my bike through the mud and then it started going really wrong, my feet started sinking into the mud and I could hear the rowers commenting that I should be careful of the sinking mud. Omigod, now I'm panicking: do I leave my bike and save myself? Will I get stuck in the mud forever? Would hubbie pick me up in the car if I was so muddy? After 10 minutes I eventually got back onto the path, with mud all over my beautiful sparkly bike and no mud guards to stop mud flicking up everywhere. As usual, another embarrassing moment.   When I got home, after much discussion with hubbie of where I was, which side of the Thames I was cycling (how do I know if its South or North) I discovered that I could have taken the road path just a bit to the side of the bridge.  Damn it!  

Silent Sunday - May the Force Be With You

The things that kids say

I know its a bit of a cliche but son 2 whose 4 years old comes out with the best lines at the moment. A recent one was: "When I'm rich, I'm going to be a soldier and own a tank" to which his Dad replied - "so you're going to be a dictator?". Another one was "Is the second worst football player in the world the Queen?"

It makes me smile to come home to my gorgeous boys after work and hear their funny comments. Since having children I haven't laughed so much, I never realised how hilarious children can be and its not just mine, their friends, next door neighbour kids, they all make me laugh. The way they make such innocent comments without cynicism and find slapstick humour so funny - I love it.  

Silent Sunday

Girls will be girls

As a sort of feminist I try hard to ensure that my boys understand that women can do anything that men can do. That women don't necessarily have to conform to society's expected roles and responsibilities of women. Sometimes my boys have to endure my feminist rants, when son 1 was a small toddler he told me that girls were always princesses and that boys were always knights. This didn't go down too well with me and hence a lecture about how women could also be knights and were just as strong and brave as men - I was quite glad with the storyline in Shrek with Fiona the princess also being able to beat up Robin Hood (watch the film). However, recently my feminist comments backfired. We've had speed bumps put outside our house and the workmen asked me to move my car to put the road markings down. As I pondered what I would do with son 2 who was waiting on the pavent, the workman kindly asked if I wanted him to reverse my car. My response, "I do know how to reverse a car" and then under my breath "women can drive cars". I then got in my car and mounted the pavement in front of the workmen, how embarassing - maybe most women can drive cars but not me under pressure.  

Being 17 again

As I was going out with some old school friends I went back to the suburbs on Saturday night and stayed over at my parents. It felt like I was 17 again with no responsibilities, no money and no kids. I arrived at my parents house to be greeted with the TV too loud (they're both hard of hearing) and my mum trying to get me to eat even though I was going out for a meal. I managed to take borrow £30 for my night out as I have no money until payday (my husband hates me asking them for money but I'm cheap compared to my brothers and I don't ask v.often). My mum kindly gave me a lift to the pub and when we arrived at this lovely gastro pub there were lots of youngsters drinking out in the summers' sunshine, so my mum thought I needed dropping off around the corner to which my reply was "I'm not 17 anymore, I'm concerned with walking too far in my shoes rather than what someone else thinks about my mum dropping me off". Later on back at my parents, I was really pleased to see my cat Keisha who has been on a sabbatical since son 2 came along. But the cat then proceeded to be sick on the bedroom carpet, ah come on my words were "I have no kids with me I want a break from cleaning up horrible substances". So I called for my mum to clear it up, but as she can't hear me I had to become an adult again. The photo from Silent Sunday is where I grew up, where I spent Saturday night and where I become 17 again.

Silent Sunday

Sleeping babies

My friend once said about children (especially young children) that they need to sleep the whole night through so that parents' tolerance and patience can be charged back up. It gets depleted and worn away during the day (with tantrums / unrealistic demands etc) but once they're asleep you stare at them and are filled back up with tolerance and adoration. After I've put them all to bed - then found whatever piece of plastic tat toy they want to sleep with, closed / opened the door at the right angle, and have the right music on at the right volume I then let out a sigh of relief that my tolerance / love can be charged back up. I often find myself in the evening, going to check on my 3 boys and just staring at how calm, peaceful and obviously gorgeous when they're asleep. Its a habit from when they were babies to check that they were still breathing. I think the threat of cot death was so drilled into me at the hospital with son 1 that I'm still scared they won't wake up. Even when one of the boys sleeps in the urge to check on them is quite strong (its v.rare with son 1 to sleep in, not so much with son 2 and the baby) and often leads to me waking them up. Its a habit that means the other night at 4.50am I suddenly realised I hadn't checked on the baby (ok not a baby at 19 months) so woke up hubbie to check whether had (he hadn't) so jumped out of bed to check on him and woke him up in the process. Will I ever learn??    

Silent Sunday / better late than never

Royal Wedding

There are lots of excitable people over at the ditzy household but also very confused. Son 1 seems to have spent a whole useful day at school making union jack flags, the royal wedding even featured in their assembly. Didn't think it was part of the national curriculum. He also thinks we are going to the royal wedding, as in we've been invited to the wedding. Not quite! Son 2 thinks that as its a wedding that granny is coming over (the only wedding we've taken them to was with granny). I've decided not to go home from work using my usual St James's Park tube station from work but go via Westminster, big mistake it was rammed with crazy Americans all camped out but it had such an electric atmosphere. So many TV crews and journalists (they outnumbered the Americans!). I then tried to find some union jack bunting for the outside of the house but everyone's sold out, I wanted to show my support as there's hardly any houses in London decorated. There are two cheap small flags in the window boxes. I did manage to get a Prince William and Kate mask for the kids though!! So excited - what are you going to be doing tomorrow? 

Wardrobe malfunctions

One of my traits of being a ditzy mummy is that I often don't put my clothes on properly like I have dressed in the dark, complete wardrobe malfunctions. Today was one of those incidents, I was trying to put on a long cardigan whilst talking to someone at work and I couldn't understand why it felt funny. I then noticed I was trying to put it on upside down. Other recent incidents have included:

• Putting on my cardigan inside out which I hadn't noticed until a colleague pointed out.
• Asking someone how my new dress was looking, reply was "great but you might want to remove the tag".
• Taking off my jeans before going to bed and realising that I'd had a pair of knickers from the washing stuffed down one of the legs - they were skinny jeans, not sure how I missed that. 
• The wrong shoes are a big problem see Not wrong shoes

I am quite pleased if I manage to get to work with an outfit that looks okish with accessories that sort of match but there have been other problems not down to my ditiziness but caused by children. With son one, when he was a baby I delivered a whole day's training without realising he had been sick down my back on my suit jacket.  At the moment, son 3 nose is at the same height as my crutch so often at work and notice that his snot has been wipped on my trousers (around the crutch area) which looks v.dodgy. Wet wipes are a mums best friend.   

Nappies

I've been motivated to join the Great Nappy Debate by Really Rachel blog about my experience of using cloth nappies. When other parents find out I use cloth nappies I can see their brains ticking over and not comprehending that I use cloth nappies as it doesn't really go with my parenting style / ways. Mainly as I tend to steer towards the slummy mummy label, didn't breastfeed, quite forgetful and am not at all earth mothery. So I like it that I challenge people's stereotypes. We have used cloth nappies for all our 3 boys and I am the biggest advocate of cloth nappies. We bought a whole bunch of motherease nappies when I was pregnant with my first, mainly as the only friend who had a baby used them so I just copied her. Now, I use them as I really don't like disposables mostly as I find the smell nasty and when my boys have worn disposables they are so skinny their trousers fall down (as cloth nappies are bulky it holds up their trousers). Strange but a practical reason as little boys can't run around with their trousers round their ankles. The cost and practicality for me is another reason I like cloth nappies, after the first batch of nappies they have lasted through all 3 boys. I have bought some more, tot bots are good for at night. Cloth nappies also don't leak poo if its runny which saves on washing clothes. I find it easier to wash nappies than go to the supermarket, buy the right sized disposables at the right another benefit is my sons have started moving it easier to do up cloth nappies with poppers than disposables that use tabs. I know there's been some ridiculous government research that concluded they are not environmentally better which was shown to be flawed research. I personally don't tumble dry the nappies and find I only have to do 2-3 washes of nappies a week as I have about 20 nappies so I can't see how I used more electricity. There are some disadvantages, as son 2 drinks lots of water when he wore nappies they often leaked (many times put him on my lap and then had a wet / wee patch on my trousers - nice). But he's the exception to the rule. Also, washing poo off the nappies is not much fun but I just shut my eyes and ignore what I'm doing. Overall though I can't see how putting scratchy disposable nappies compares to putting a little baby's bottom in soft cloth. I would recommend the The Nappy Lady for good advice and to buy nappies. If you're looking to buy Let me know your experiences / comments / criticisms.

Silent Sunday

Major meltdown

We are on a big thing with son 1 and son 2 to tidy up after themselves (ie. put clothes in laundry bin, tidy toys away, put cups by the sink - blah blah). Its not going well, and yesterday son 1 couldn't find his bicycle helmet as he couldn't remember where he left it because he doesn't put things back. This lead to a major meltdown, lots of shouting and crying (that was just me!) at the boys as they are really not 'getting' the whole tidying up behaviour. Embarssingly as it was a hot day all the windows and doors were open, so our next door neighbours heard my complete meltdown and then I bumped into them 5 minutes afterwards and they couldn't look me in the eye (I think they were scared - I was really shouting). Later on at bathtime, I was asking son 2 where the jug for washing hair was. He got out of the bath, found the jug in his brother's room and stated "mummy, if you put it back in the proper place after you have used it then you would have been able to find it". Blimey, I can't believe he's throwing back at me the lessons I'm trying to teach them. He's so cute, it really made me smile!!! All I can say is I bet girls would tidy up after themselves.

Sick baby

We've had our second visit to A&E in 6.5 years. As I see from work how much NHS money which are far too precious is spent on people not using A&E properly I rarely take the kids to A&E if they are sick but we had a bit of an alarm this week with son 3 (aka the baby). I had a frantic phone call from our nanny on Tuesday, she never calls me so I knew it was something serious. Son 3 has had a nasty cold and cough for a few weeks but didn't seem that sick, a bit of temperature but went down with calpol. After his nap, our nanny had noticed that he was shaking, his eyes were glazed over and he couldn't breathe properly which she thought was the beginning of a fit. So she'd rushed him to the doctors at the top of our road, they called an ambulance straight away and gave him oxygen. At this moment, I'm racing back from Waterloo trying to get to Ealing Hospital with awful thoughts going through my head. When I finally got to the hospital he was better but still quite hot (still high temperature) and unhappy. He'd had a febrile convulsion due to a virus, poor little thing. He's now better after the GP finally gave him antibiotics and he's started recovering from a bad chest infection. The whole experience scared the s**t out of me, I felt completely helpless that I wasn't with him when he was in the ambulance and guilt that I should have looked after him better so he didn't get so ill / shouldn't have gone to work when he was unwell. To make matters worse we had been trying to get him off the bottle as he's now 18 months and a health visitor at work told me it will rot his teeth to still give him milk in a bottle. This hadn't been going too well and he was refusing milk and sometimes water in a lid cup so he was dehydrated. My mother's instinct was telling me that he was deydrated and needed a bottle to get fluid but I was influenced by other people.

Silent Sunday

Silent Sunday - devised by mocha beanie mummy

Kreative Blog Award

I would like to thank 'would like to be a yummy mummy' fhttp://wouldliketobeayummymummy.blogspot.com/ or awarding me a Kreativ Blogger Award. The Rules are:

• Link to 10 blogs; 
• Tell these bloggers about the award; and
• Share 10 facts about myself.

1. When I was student, my favourite receipe I devised and loved was noodles, creme fraiche mixed with hoi sin sauce and sweetcorn.

2. With son 1 I was induced many times and in  labour (on and off) over a 5 day period until I had an emergency caesaran, I was extremely excited but extraordinately tired when he was born.

3. I used to work for a charity called Business in the Community, Prince Charles was the President of the charity and very interested in the initiative worked on. This led to me going to lunch at Highgrove with Prince Charles which was fascinating to see whose photos he had up!!!

4. I can't sew, not at all. Every button I've sewed as fallen off and any hem I've attempted to turn up has fallen down. I now take all my repairs to a man down the road.

5. When I was 11 (or could have been 12) I spent a weekend attempting back flips on an old matress, when I finally succeeded it felt such an achievement.

6. I love chocolate and wine, seperately or together.

7. I went to university as a mature student (at the tender age of 21 but that was a mature student and I got a grant). I proved to my teachers that I was clever enough to go to university (always in the top streams but a school that was obbessed by their place in the league tables).

8. As a 5 year old I loved a brown corduary dress and wouldn't wear anything else.

9. I used cloth nappies for all my babies, it doesn't really fit my other slummy mummy ways but I hate disposable nappies and hate the thought of mountains and mountains of landfill.

10. I love all the American TV series, Brothers & Sisters, Gray's Anatomy, The Good Wife, House, Fringe etc.

The blogs I'm sharing make me laugh, ponder, and sometimes gasp in horrow they are:


Curtains for the Window



mommy-beadzoid


hello its gemma


Working london mummy


Alyson Blog


Manic Mum


Domestic anarchist


Lungs behaving badly


http://beth-multuminparvo.blogspot.com/

Muddled words

Sometimes I get my words muddled up. Today having a bit of a discussion with son 1 and son 2 about another child that our nanny occassionally looks after. He's been fainting, then staying passed out every day at school for the past few weeks. Our nanny had told me about it and explained it to my boys as they sometimes play together. Son 1 told me that he couldn't remember the word for the condition that it might be, I said "oh I'm sure its necrophilia, no that sounds wrong, I'm not sure the name of the condition". It's narcolepsy that he might have, the condition where someone suddenly falls into a deep sleep (River Phoenix played a character in the film My Own Private Idaho) not the condition where you have urges to get jiggy with a dead person. Whoops, need to get my words right before talking to 'the child who remembers everything'.